The presidential election is one
year away, and many Americans are already complaining about the candidates.
My complaint is a little different:
I find their campaign slogans uninspiring, whether it's "Hillary For
America" (Clinton), "Heal, Inspire, Revive" (Carson),
"Reigniting The Promise Of America" (Cruz), "Defeat The
Washington Machine" (Paul), "Make America Great Again" (Trump),
"New Possibilities. Real Leadership" (Fiorina), or that Seinfeldian
slogan that says absolutely nothing, "Jeb!"
Sure, there have been some lousy
slogans in the past, like "I'm Madly For Adlai" (Stevenson 1952) or
""We Polked you
in '44, We shall Pierce you in '52" (Franklin Pierce 1852), referring to
James K. Polk, who was elected eight year before.
But many of them have been great, although some of the
winners reneged as soon as they were elected. For instance:
"54-40 or Fight!" (Polk 1844), referring to a
border dispute with Canada. Polk won but settled the border on much less
favorable terms, at the 49th parallel, instead.
"Read my lips. No new taxes." (George H.W. Bush
1988), who, of course, promptly raised new taxes.
"A chicken in every pot and a new car in every
garage." – (Hoover 1928), who within a year was presiding over the worst
depression in American history.
"He kept us out of war." (Wilson 1916), who took
America into World War I six months later.
"Let's make it a Landon-slide." (Landon 1936), who
got his wish, although not the way he intended: He lost in the greatest
landslide in history up to that time.
And, of course, "Nixon's the One" (Nixon 1968), a
slogan that took on ironic meaning during the Watergate scandal.
But some slogans have been sheer genius, including:
"Tippecanoe
and Tyler Too" (Harrison 1840), referring to
his victory at the Battle of Tippecanoe. His running mate was John Tyler.
"Keep cool with Coolidge." (Coolidge 1924)
"I'm just mild about Harry." (Dewey 1948)
Occasionally we have had dueling slogans, for instance:
"Ma, ma, where's my pa?" (Blaine 1884), referring
to Grover Cleveland's admission that he had fathered an illegitimate child.
"Gone to the White House, Ha, Ha, Ha!" (Cleveland
1884)
"No third term." (Willkie 1940)
"Better a third termer than a third rater." (FDR
1940)
"In your heart you know he's right." (Goldwater
1964)
"In your guts you know he's nuts." (Johnson 1964)
And the best presidential
campaign slogan of all? Easy: "I like Ike" (1952). Short, sweet and simple.
And it rhymes!
But my favorite slogan comes not from a presidential race
but the 1991 Louisiana governor's race. On one side: former Gov. Edwin Edwards.
He was corrupt through and through, which wasn't much of a problem in a state
that has a long history of charming rogues. (He once boasted, "The only way
I'm going to lose is if I'm found in bed with a dead girl or a live boy.")
But he did have a big drawback: He was a supporter of civil rights. A local
newspaper predicted, "The only way he could win would be if his opponent
is Adolf Hitler."
His opponent wasn't Hitler, but he turned out to be the next
best thing: David Duke, Grand Wizard of the Ku Klux Klan and a notorious
neo-Nazi.
Edwards' winning slogan: "Vote for the crook. It's
important."
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