A Musician Of Note

(Above: Audrey Vardanega)

If you're looking for something really fun to do this month, you couldn't do better than the 38^th annual Midsummer Mozart Festival.

Why am I such a fan? Partly, it's because Mozart is the greatest composer who ever lived. That's not meant as a knock on other great composers, from Bach to Ellington. I love their stuff, but nobody can touch Mozart. His music sounds like it was dictated by God. Theirs doesn't.

It's so good, you don't need to know anything about music to "get" it. Like the Beatles, you're hooked from the first note.

I also love the festival because of the quality of its orchestra and soloists. They're some of the best musicians in the world, including pianist Seymour Lipkin, tenor Christopher Bengochea, bass Kurt Eichelberger, and sopranos Rebecca Davis and Christina Major, all under the direction of one of the world's foremost Mozartians, Maestro George Cleve.

But for me, the biggest draw is 16-year-old phenom Audrey Vardanega, who will perform Mozart's Piano Concerto in G, K. 453.

I first heard Audrey play when she was only 13; and even at that age, she blew me away. Her technical proficiency was immaculate, of course, but her artistry went way beyond getting all the notes right.

Audrey is one of those rare musicians who can communicate not only the essence of the music, but also the sheer joy she takes in playing it.

Remember what Wynton Marsalis said about Count Basie in Ken Burns' "Jazz" documentary? "Basie would be swinging before he even played the first note." That's Audrey, too. She and the music – and the audience – are one.

I asked Cleve how good she was for her age. He laughed and replied, "Martin, she's good for ANY age!"

And the best part is that none of this has gone to her head. She's just a really nice kid who happens to have an extraordinary talent.

Make that talents, plural. As good as she is on the piano, she's also fantastic on the violin.

She's also an accomplished composer with dozens of sonatas, suites and musical scores to her credit, including an original ballet called "Zingara," which will be performed this fall with the Academy Orchestra in San Francisco.

And as if this weren't enough, she's also a talented actor who has interned with ACT in San Francisco.

From an early age, people have been pulling her in all directions. The piano people keep telling her to dump the violin and be a pianist. The violin people tell her to dump the piano and be a violinist. And the theater people tell her to dump them both and be an actor.

To her credit, Audrey doesn't want to be any of those things. She has a loftier ambition: She wants to be Audrey. She doesn't want to be defined by her talents.

That's why she goes to College Prep in Oakland instead of a music conservatory. As she told me, "I want people to judge me by my personality, not my piano playing."

But don't take my word for it; go hear her for yourself. The festival will run from July 19-29 at locations in Berkeley, San Francisco, San Jose and Sonoma County. Visit midsummermozart.org to purchase tickets and get information about specific programs.

The Maid Of Gettysburg

(Above: Jennie Wade)

Next Sunday, Monday and Tuesday will mark the 149^th anniversary of the Battle of Gettysburg, the turning point of the Civil War.

I visited Gettysburg a few weeks ago, seeing places whose names still resonate in the national memory: The Wheat Field. The Peach Orchard. Little Round Top. Devil's Den.

But the place that moved me the most was the Jennie Wade House at 548 Baltimore Street.

Think how overwhelmed the 2,400 residents of Gettysburg must have felt when their little town was invaded by 93,000 Federals and 75,000 Confederates slugging away at each other in their front yards.

When the battle broke out, 20-year-old Jennie was helping her mother care for her sister Georgia, who was bedridden after giving birth a few days earlier.

The Federals formed a skirmish line behind the house, exchanging fire with the rebels two blocks away.

Moved by compassion and patriotism, Jennie baked bread for them and brought them water. It was dangerous work, but she said, "If there is anyone in this house that is to be killed today, I hope it is me, as Georgia has a little baby."

On the morning of Day Three she was in the kitchen, kneading dough for more bread, when a Confederate bullet smashed through the front door and pierced her heart, killing her instantly.

Her mother, who was taking loaves out of the oven, turned around and saw Jennie sink to the floor.

In shock, she staggered to the bedroom and told Georgia, "Your sister is dead."

Georgia let out a scream, which alerted the soldiers outside. They burst through the door, sized up the situation, and decided they had to get the family out of there as soon as possible.

They led the survivors – Mrs. Wade, Georgia, her newborn baby, Jenny's little brother Harry, and a six-year-old neighbor boy named Isaac - through the rear of the house into the cellar, where they might find some protection from the gunfire.

And there they stayed for the next 18 hours, with Jennie's body lying on a wooden bench beside them, while the battle raged above their heads.

When they finally emerged, the house was pockmarked by more than 150 bullet holes, which are still there today. (So is the hole in the front door from the bullet that killed Jennie.) The horror and terror they must have experienced during this ordeal is unimaginable.

They buried Jennie in the front yard, with dough from the bread she had been making still on her fingers.

The Civil War turned brother against brother, friend against friend. Two Gettysburg boys named Jack Skelly and Wes Culp, best friends since childhood, chose opposite sides – Jack fought for the Union and Wes fought for the Confederacy.

They were reunited two weeks before the battle, when Jack was wounded and captured by Confederate troops. Wes found out and rushed Jack to a hospital, where he nursed him night and day.

But it was no use. Jack died from his wounds. But before he died he asked Wes to deliver a message to his sweetheart in Gettysburg.

Wes tried his best, but he was killed on the second day of the battle before he found her.

But even if he had lived, he wouldn't have been able to deliver the message. Because Jack's sweetheart was Jennie Wade.

Fun Summer Reads

School's out for the summer, and once again our children are wondering what to read for fun, now that they don't have to read anything for schoolwork.
Wonder no more, kids. Here, courtesy of Jen Ammenti, the librarian at Redwood Day School in Oakland, is our annual Ms. Ammenti's Summer Reading List.
Kindergarten: "The Duckling Gets a Cookie" by Mo Willems, "Chloe" by Peter McCarty, and "A Sick Day for Amos McGee" by Philip Christian Stead.
First Grade: "Toys Come Home: Being the Early Experiences of an Intelligent Stingray, a Brave Buffalo, and a Brand-New Someone Called Plastic (Toys Go Out)" by Emily Jenkins, "Bink and Gollie, Two for One" by Kate DiCamillo, and "I Want My Hat Back" by J. Klassen.
Second Grade: "The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom" by Christopher Healy, "Bad Kitty for President" by Nick Bruel, and "Wonderstruck" by Brian Selznick.
Third Grade: "The Trouble with Chickens: A J.J. Tully Mystery" by Doreen Cronin, "The Year of the Book" by Andrea Cheng, and "Tua and the Elephant" by Randal Harris.
Fourth Grade: "The Birchbark House" by Louise Erdrich, "Winterling" by Sarah Prineas, and "Summer of the Gypsy Moths" by Sara Pennypacker.
Fifth Grade: "The Game of Silence" and "The Porcupine Year," both by Louise Erdrich, and "It Happened on a Train" by Mac Barnett.
Sixth Grade: "Wonder" by R. J. Palacio, "One Crazy Summer" by Rita Williams-Garcia, and "Breaking Stalin's Nose" by Eugene Yelchin.
Seventh Grade: "Shooting Kabul" by N. H. Senzai, "Middle School: Get Me Out Of Here!" by James Patterson, and "Crow" by Barbara Wright.
Eighth Grade: "Between Shades of Gray" by Ruta Sepetys, "The Hobbit" by J.R.R. Tolkien, and "The Girl Is Murder" by Kathryn Miller.
And here are her top picks:
For Emerging Readers: "The Trouble with Chickens: A J.J. Tully Mystery" by Doreen Cronin. "Cronin's stories are always so much fun to read aloud because the giggles never stop. You can't help but love the characters immediately and wonder what will happen next."
For Middle Readers: The Birchbark House series by Louise Erdrich. "You cannot help but feel transported back in time to the westward expansion of the United States through the eyes of a young Ojibwa girl. For lovers of 'Little House of the Prairie,' these books will offer another perspective of the same time period."
For Young Adults: "Between Shades Of Gray" by Ruta-Sepetys. "Definitely not a light read, but one that will move you to tears and open your eyes to the true horrors of war. Sepetyus does an incredible job of keeping hope alive throughout the novel. Just when you think the characters can't take any more, they endure."
Incidentally, I talked with N.H. Senzai, the author of "Shooting Kabul," which tops Ms. Ammenti's seventh grade list.
Her real name is Naheed Senzai. "Shooting Kabul" is based on her husband's experiences as a little boy growing up in war-torn Afghanistan.
So why does she bill herself as "N.H." instead of Naheed?
"It's a branding thing," she explained. "Why do you think J.K. Rowling is called J.K. instead of Joanne? Because studies have shown that little boys are reluctant to pick up a book if they think it's been written by a woman."
We've come a long way, but we still have a long way to go.

You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch

Uh oh. The Grinch has struck again.

This time, the victim is a reader who wrote me about an incident last Wednesday in their quiet neighborhood in the Berkeley hills.

Her husband was cleaning out the garage, and when it came time for lunch he left some of the stuff in the driveway while he ducked inside for a snack.

When he came back, everything was gone.

Most of the stolen items can be replaced, but not the most precious possessions of all – the family Christmas ornaments, lovingly handmade and collected over three generations.

Gone was a whole village of little ceramic buildings, little people, little angels and, of course, a little Santa.

Gone were the intricate locomotive ornaments (her husband is a train buff) and miniature musical instruments. (He also plays the clarinet.)

Gone was the lobster ornament they brought from New England and the extremely fragile 19^th Century ornaments that their former landlady gave them back in the 1960s.

"They had come with her parents on a ship around the Cape, before there was a Panama Canal," she wrote me.  "We always took such care to avoid dropping those."

But what hurt the most were the simple little ornaments that she made over the years with her children, and then her grandchildren.

"They were homely little ornaments made with love, and they have no value to anyone but us," she wrote. "I don't think I can bear this any longer, so I'll stop now."

She managed to keep it together when she called the kids to tell them what happened.

"But later, when my granddaughters called to say how sad they were for what had happened, I just burst into tears over the phone. I thought of all the traditions we had built up over the years, and I felt that's what had really been stolen."

None of the neighbors saw or heard anything, so it's doubtful the police will be able to catch the crook. So her 8-year-old granddaughter Casey is appealing to a higher authority:

"Dear Santa Claus, I need you to do a favor for me . . . And it's not a present for me. It's a present for someone else. My grandma and grandpa. And it's a special gift. So they were cleaning out their garadge and they put EVERY single Christmas thing out side and then in just one hour it was all gone. So hears the favor. If you can get most of it back that would be soooooooooooo AMAZEING!  Love, Casey

"P.S. Please!"

Meanwhile, Casey's grandma is turning to somebody more mundane: me.

"If the person who took our things is reading this, would you let Martin Snapp know if there is any way we can get back that one box of ornaments?" she wrote. "It would mean the world to me, our children, and our grandchildren."

Memo to the thief: Email me at the address below or call 510-748-1666 and leave a message. Here's a rare chance to right a wrong you've done.

And the next time you think of stealing something, ask yourself: Is the piddling little money you might get really worth having something like this on your conscience?

Lumberyard Lullaby

She came, she sawed, she conquered.

Caroline McCaskey of San Pablo brought down the house at the San Francisco Symphony in three concerts from May 10-12 with her deft performance of the violin solo from Offenbach's "Orpheus in the Underworld."

The San Jose Mercury raved, "Caroline McCaskey practically stole the show by playing Offenbach with the soaring lyric perfection of a great diva."

But she didn't play it on the violin, even though she's an accomplished fiddler. She played it on the musical saw!

She was nervous before the first rehearsal, but when she reached the highest note in the cadenza, members of the orchestra signaled their approval by clapping, whistling and stomping their feet.

Conductor Michael Tilson Thomas also got a big kick out of it - laughing, applauding and slapping the side of the piano. After the first concert he gave her a big hug.

"I took that as a good sign," she says.

MTT was even more effusive after the final concert on Saturday, kissing her on both cheeks and exclaiming, "You ripped us up!" (Old lumber mill pun.)

He also autographed her saw – a 28-inch Charlie Blacklock CB Special, writing, "For Caroline, the prima donna assoluta of the saw. Brava!" on the blade.

That saw will never be used again.

"I have retired it," she says. "MTT has been a hero of mine at least since high school, if not before."

Not to worry. She still has another Charlie Blacklock CB Special, autographed by Blacklock himself, as well as an ordinary carpenter's saw she bought at Home Depot. Blacklock signed his saw on the handle, not the blade, so she can still play it without worrying about erasing his autograph.

Blacklock, who lived in Alameda, died in 2008. He was one of the greatest sawyers – that's the technical term - who ever lived.

In 2007 Caroline won the annual International Musical Saw Competition – aka "The Saw-Off" – in Roaring Camp, defeating many old timers who have been playing the saw for longer than she's been alive.

"The competition is just an excuse to get together," she says. "There are so few sawyers in the world, it's hard to find someone to play with. The real fun happens beforehand and afterwards, at the jam sessions."

Curiously, the musical saw is actually a sidelight for Caroline, who splits her time between teaching in the San Francisco Bay Area and at Swallow Hill Music in Denver, where she teaches fiddle, cello and, of course, musical saw.

But her first love is the fiddle, which she plays solo as well as in musical groups, including the San Francisco Scottish Fiddlers.

As I said, Charlie Blacklock was one of the greatest musical saw players ever. But he was not the most famous.

That distinction belongs to – believe it or not – Marlene Dietrich! (You can see videos of her playing the saw on YouTube or Google video. You can see Caroline, too.)

Incidentally, this was not Caroline's first time in the limelight. A few years ago, she and her saw were featured on "I've Got A Secret," along with a strongman who bends nails in half, a woman with the world's smallest waist (15 inches, and she's had three kids!) and the man who invented the pink flamingo lawn ornament.

Trailer Trash

Now it can be told! Together again for the first time! It's the film event of the year!

On June 8 the Pacific Film Archives in Berkeley will present "Trailer Trash: A Mini-Movie Extravaganza," a compilation of 40 - count 'em, 40! – movie trailers from some of the cheesiest B-movies of the 1950s, '60s and early '70s.

Among them: "I Was A Teenage Frankenstein," "Queen Of Outer Space," "Blood Of The Vampire," "The Naked Kiss," "Tammy Tell Me True," and "Burn, Witch, Burn!"

Return with us now to the thrilling days of yesteryear, when movie trailers were tiny, two-minute spectacles filed with thunderous scores, thrills and spills galore, and stentorian voices booming with blustery conviction, "A love that knows no bounds!" "In a land where passion reigns!" and "All the emotions of a LIFETIME!"

"Why wade through an entire feature film when a crisply condensed version can compress ninety minutes into a pithy two or three?" says Steve Seid, the PFA's film curator.

This event stems from Seid's lifelong fascination with cinema's historical roots.

"It comes out of vaudeville and the old tent shows. Back in the day, people would travel around the country with prints, like a carney, and the pitch was as important as the picture. The less a film had to offer, the harder it had to sell itself."

No stone will be left unturned in an attempt to recreate the atmosphere of the original experience, including strategically located misters that will periodically spray the aroma of popcorn. (Food isn't allowed in the PFA theater.)

Two years ago PFA hosted a similar event called "Exploit-O-Vision," featuring films that had gimmicks attached to them, recreating the original gimmicks.

"During 'The Maniacs Are Loose,' about an ax murder in a movie theater, another person and I ran through up and down the aisles swinging axes," says Seid. "When we showed 'Polyester,' John Waters gave me a whole bunch of scratch-and-sniff cards to go with it."

And for a screening of "Earthquake," featuring a gimmicky format called Sensaround, Seid borrowed humongous sub-woofers from Meyer Sound, the premier sound equipment company in West Berkeley that supplies speakers to everyone from the Grateful Dead to the Dalai Lama.

"They were so enormous, they literally made the room shake like a roller coaster," he says.

One thing you'll notice is that the trailers sound like they were all narrated by the same guy.

"That's because only three or four people do voice-overs for trailers in L.A.," Seid explains. "They're so successful, they are chauffeured from studio to studio several times a day. They get out, do the voice-over, then get back in the limo and drive on to their next gig.

"Most of these guys have been doing it for two or three decades. So it's always the same set of voices, same vocabulary, and same emotive thrust."

But despite this continuity, Seid says trailers ain't what they used to be.

"Lots of trailers nowadays are nothing but fast cuts, and they end up summarizing the entire film. That's a dangerous strategy. You end up thinking, 'Why should I bother watching the movie?'"

The management requests that for the greater entertainment of your friends who have not yet read this column, you do not reveal the ending.

Baa Baa Black Sheep

                                        (Above: one of the new lambs)
Ever since Twinkle the sheep died last September, everyone at Children's Fairyland in Oakland, from Juan the alpaca to Puddles the duck, has missed her terribly.

But today there are nothing but smiles because this weekend Fairyland will welcome Twinkle's successors: a pair of 4-month-old lambs.

The lambs – both males – are Olde English Babydoll Southdown Sheep, and that's important because Baybdolls are resistant to megaesophogus, the congenital defect that killed Twinkle.

They're called Babydolls for good reason: They're only 18 inches high. And that's as tall as they're ever going to get, so they'll look like lambs for the rest of their lives.

And they'll always act like lambs, too, because sheep born in the wintertime are especially gentle, loving and sweet. They like to snuggle more and get more hands-on treatment from their keepers than sheep born in the summer, who roam outdoors from an early age.

"They've been hand-held and coddled and adored and smothered with love," says Deborah Ramirez, the animal caregiver at Fairyland. "And they've been raised with alpacas, llamas and goats, so they should fit right in with the other animals in our corral."

The little guys, who were donated by Dr. Jamie Peyton of Elysian Oaks Farm in Winters, are chocolate colored with black faces and stockings. And their wool is the same grade as cashmere - Class C.

They haven't been named yet, and that's where you come in. Fairyland is celebrating their arrival with a naming contest. Submit your suggestions in special boxes located throughout the park or at www.facebook.com/childrensfairyland.

The winner will get lunch for four people, plus a behind-the-scenes V.I.P. tour of Fairyland's animal area.

Speaking of animals, you've probably heard of therapy dogs and therapy cats who visit hospitals and nursing homes. But would you believe a therapy camel?

Get ready to meet Hump-Free, an honest-to-goodness dromedary - that's a camel with only one hump – who does animal-assisted therapy at a ranch for troubled kids.

He and his buddies – Quill-Amina the hedgehog, Interrogator the alligator, Scooter the Macaw, Scarlett the cockatoo, and Galindo the jungle cat – will visit Fairyland next Saturday, June 2, for a special guest appearance.

And there's still more animal news! On June 12 Fairyland will re-open its Little Red Henhouse, which has been closed for decades.

The new residents will be three heirloom chickens, so called because they look like chickens used to look before the food industry started producing freaks that can barely walk because of their enormous breasts and thighs.

One is a blond Silkie – think of Snoopy's pal, Woodstock – one is a reddish-colored Orpington, and the third is a black Cochin.

They are being donated by Allison Lindquist, executive director of the Oakland-East Bay SPCA, who raises heirloom chickens as a hobby.

"They're crazy beautiful," says Fairyland's executive director, C.J. Hirschfield. "And she hand-raised them, so they're very docile and friendly."

If you'd like to help support this precious local treasure, the most enjoyable way I can think of is to attend Fairyland's major fundraiser of the year, the annual gala dinner on June 7. Fairytale attire is optional.

If you don't have children, it's a rare chance to see Fairyland in person because at other times the park has a safety rule: No child admitted without an adult, and no adult admitted without a child.

Visit www.facebook.com/childrensfairyland for details.